Mothers of Boys

            When I was a kid I was all about dressing up and things that sparkle. I don’t remember any toys—not that I didn’t have any. I spent most of my time in my parents’ living room dancing to whatever records (yup those black vinyl things) happened to be around. I would end each dance with a big sweeping curtsy. The best gift I ever received was a garbage bag filled with hand-me-down dance recital costumes from my cousins. It was a dream come true.

            God has a fantastic sense of humor. I am now the mother of two boys—mud pie making, plastic sword wielding, rock collecting, bear hug giving boys. They are Cub Scouts who play soccer in the fall and baseball in the spring. They love slapstick humor and fart jokes. They look under rocks for bugs. In short, they are boys and that’s why I’m linking up with Boy Mom Blog Hop over at the M.O.B. Society’s website.

            Welcome to my blog, my name is Victoria, sometimes known as Vickie, but usually called Mom or Owen and James’ Mom. I started this blog almost a year ago right after I turned thirty-nine (hence the name of the blog). During the evenings or when my kids are in school I work part time selling furniture. It isn’t the job of my dreams, but it allows me the flexibility I need to raise my kids, be involved with community theatre, and write. I blog about family, creativity, fitness, and food, but most often about my adventures with my two boys. They have a wonderful relationship and are very different from one another.

            Owen is nine-years-old and takes being the oldest very seriously. He is always concerned about the well being of his little brother. He is smart, conscientious, funny, and fiercely loyal. He is shy for the first 30 seconds you meet, then he’ll talk your ear off for hours. He loves Legos, Star Wars, Transformers, paper airplanes, and loud music. His favorite books at the moment are the Diary of a Wimpy Kid books, anything in graphic novel format, and anything related to Star Wars.

            James is seven and is a skinny little “big man on campus”.  He becomes friends with just about everyone he meets. The worst moment of his life was the day we dropped Owen off at preschool for the first time and he realized he wasn’t going. All those kids and he couldn’t stay to play—it took me 20 minutes to get him into his car seat. He loves animals, puzzles, games, and anything the other kids are doing. James has a lot in common with Curious George.

            The final cast member in the comedy of my life is my husband Dan. We’ve been married for fifteen years. He’s smart, funny, patient, honest, a great dad, handsome, and talented. It still amazes me that this wonderful relationship started at a college keg party. So in addition to believing that God has a sense of humor, I also believe in miracles.

            Thanks so much for stopping by my blog. I can’t wait to start reading and meeting more of the ladies linking up with the M.O.B.!

TRDC: The Gift

 Today’s post is based on a prompt from The Red Dress Club. Our assignment was to revise an old piece. I found this flash fiction story I wrote for an on-line writing class I took in the spring of 2010. The class inspired me to start writing again and eventually to start this blog. It was great to look back and realize how much I’ve grown as a writer and have the chance to really improve one of my first stories. The original prompt for this story was to begin with the sentence, “Pat knew for a long time that a clairvoyant gift was a mixed blessing.” My favorite part of rewriting this story was getting rid of that opening sentence!

The Gift

Pat’s gift was limited. Her clairvoyance never reached beyond the ringing telephone. Her husband often remarked that they didn’t need caller ID. He would look at her when the phone rang. “Don’t bother,” she would say while preparing dinner, “it’s only a telemarketer.”  Pat’s mother had the gift too. One of her earliest memories was of her mother, elbow deep in soapy water when the phone rang saying, “Can you answer that honey? I think it’s my brother. He’s probably having a bad day.”

Today the sound of the phone made her chest feel cold. Pat didn’t know who was on the other end of the line. She only knew they were calling with bad news. Pat considered not answering it. Maybe if she didn’t pick up the phone the bad thing might never happen. Shaking off the nonsense of that thought, she picked up the phone with a trembling hand, “Hello?”

“Hello. Mrs. Jones?”

“Yes.”

“This is Lorraine from Dr. Fenton’s office.”

Pat’s annual physical had been a few days before. She sat down at her kitchen table and fumbled with her teacup. The amber liquid splashed onto the linen placemat. “Oh? Hello Lorraine. What can I do for you?”

“I’m just calling to let you know your blood tests all came back normal.”

“Normal?”

“Yes. Everything is fine. CBC came back normal. Cholesterol is normal—in fact it’s quite good. We won’t need see you again for another year unless anything come up.” Reported Lorraine.

“Really?” Pat tried to slow her breathing. “Well, thanks for calling. You have a good afternoon Lorraine”

“Thanks. You too Mrs. Jones.”

Pat hung up the phone. The cold feeling in her chest remained. She breathed deeply, willing herself to relax. “It was nothing silly,” she told herself. “You were worried over nothing.”

Lorraine tucked the report back into the folder labeled Pamela Jones and prepared to make the next call. These were the toughest. She had to be vague and give as little information as possible—just get the patient back in to see the doctor and have more tests done. She took a deep breath as the phone rang.

“Hello?”

 “Hello. Mrs. Jones? This is Lorraine from Dr. Fenton’s office.”

Learning to Let Someone Else do the Work

            Both of my boys have summer birthdays. So for the past six years, we have thrown a huge family barbeque to celebrate both birthdays. We invite family and friends and fire up the grill and have a great time. It has gotten bigger every year. I throw another detail into the mix each year. The first year it was just food, drinks, a cake and a little favor for the kids to take home. Then there was a pinata. Next organized games. And then prizes. It was exhausting, but I loved it. Entertaining is fun for me. I’m a planner at heart and this kind of thing is right up my alley.

            Because we celebrated a day other than either boys’ actual birthday we also had smaller celebrations with just the four of us on their days. Owen wanted to play mini golf and go out for pizza. James wanted to see a movie (plus popcorn and candy) and have dinner at an Italian restaurant. And there were presents. What’s a birthday without presents? By the time August rolled around our credit card bill was a little scary.

            So this year I told the boys we needed to scale back. We could either throw the “in-between party” (as it has come to be known) or they could have individual celebrations. But we wouldn’t do both. They had always envied their friends’ mid-winter celebrations at bowling alleys, gymnastics facilities, and other indoor venues. So it was no surprise they chose to celebrate individually away from home. We had Owen’s party at a local mini-golf place. My preparation involved, making a couple of phone calls, ordering a cake, putting together goody bags (which the boys helped with), and handing over my credit card.

The party cost me a small fraction of hosting a party at home the way I’ve been doing it and I didn’t make myself (or my husband) nuts preparing. I'm beginning to understand why no one I know has children's parties at their homes these days. As you can see, the kids had a great time. It was a fun and relaxing day for all of us—now that’s something to celebrate.

Cheap Therapy

            Yesterday was one of those days. I had signed the kids up for a sports camp all week so I could work day shifts at my job. I wouldn’t be making much money—but I really prefer working days to nights and the financial trade off seemed worth it to me. We have a great summer program run through the school system here. The kids can choose from six different sports and the cost is very reasonable.

Then my car broke down Wednesday night while Owen and I were shopping for a birthday present for James. I had it towed to my mechanic and called my manager to say I wouldn’t be at work the next day. I felt a little guilty because we’re really short staffed right now, but I didn’t see an alternative.

            My neighbor was kind enough to lend me her car to bring the boys to camp. I was a nervous wreck—my car is a ten-year-old Windstar with 111,000 miles on it. Her car is a Jaguar that has half the miles and is rarely used to transport juice box wielding little boys.

            It took most of the day for the mechanic to figure out what was wrong with the car. It wouldn’t stall out for him so he had to keep taking it out to drive. Finally in the afternoon he called to say it was the cam sensor and it would cost about $400 to fix. That’s the second $400 repair bill in less than two weeks. Also, the part wouldn’t be in until the next day, which meant another day of missed work unless I rented a car.

            I called around and renting a car would cost me slightly more than I would earn if I went to work on Friday. I made another guilt-ridden call to my manager and explained the situation. I was feeling worse and worse. I couldn’t shake that “everything sucks” feeling that had taken over my brain. I had put out around $280 to send the boys to camp so I could work this week and I only ended up working six hours. Plus I had a $400 repair bill on my hands.

            My husband came home from work a little early so he could pick up the kids from camp. He asked me if I wanted to go to the gym after dinner. No, I didn’t want to go to the gym. I wanted to wallow on the couch with some chocolate ice cream and watch old episodes of Dr. Who (my current obsession) on Netflix. But I couldn’t be a slug in the face of Dan’s dedication to fitness, so I grabbed my iPod and laced up my Sauconys after dinner.

            Dan went to kickboxing, which is really intense and held in an un-air-conditioned gym. I’m not quite as insane dedicated as he is so I went to the nice cool fitness center and found a treadmill. I jogged for the first ten minutes or so wishing I had never left the couch. My foot hurt, my knees ached, and even with air conditioning I felt hot. I pushed myself to stay on the treadmill and slowly started to unwind. My body warmed up and stopped aching. The tension came out of my body along with the sweat. I started putting things in perspective.

            So, my car was broken down. It happens. I was missing work. But I had a job to go to in the first place. I was paying for the kids to go to camp. They were having a great time and I had managed to get a few things done around the house. I was going to feel like I owed favors to the coworkers who were covering for me. Big deal—what goes around comes around.

            By the time I had been on the treadmill for 45 minutes I was calmer and happier. I started working out to be thinner and stronger. I stick with it for what it does to my mind and spirit. I don’t make time for exercise as often as I did when my boys were younger. But I’m always happy when I do. Besides, I still managed to watch a little Dr. Who and I didn’t need the ice cream anymore.

Lucky Seven

            One of the first things they teach you in writing classes is to avoid clichés. But I find it difficult to mark my Childrens' birthdays without saying things like, "It seems like yesterday..."? So today, in honor of my baby’s seventh birthday, I’m breaking the rules. After all, he loves to break rules.

A Perfect Baby Boy

A Bundle of Joy

I Could Eat Him Up!

They get so big, so fast!

Time flies when you're having fun!

Happy Birthday James!